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christmas is so much worse as you get older it’s like “what do you want this year?” “a sense of purpose”

"a career" "financial security" "a sex life" "tuition for grad school" "alcohol" "a nap" "socks would be nice"

After spending excessive amounts of time studying tax law, I don’t think I quite comprehend the concept of alimony. Child support? Yes, sure. That makes sense, but why do I have to pay you alimony after we’re divorced? Shit son. Get a fucking job. Wtf?! Marriage is like a life-long debt agreement if you by chance decide to divorce, because apparently you’re required to pay alimony until the person dies. This is exactly why prenups are necessary. 

Anonymous said: Ummmmm, they haven't stopped reporting in Gaza, or any of the wars yet... I mean, sure, Robin Williams is being reported a little more, but that because it's a new story. Last night, the breaking story was the child soldier holding up the severed head. They haven't stopped reporting on the war yet....

You know what? I feel like this back-and-forth is absolutely pointless. You do you, dude. I don’t even care anymore. 

Anonymous said: Besides, those same people couldn't tell you what they were even if he didn't die. Don't blame a celebrity death for unawareness of worldly issues. They're not a beached whale where you have to pat attention to it 24/7. I mean no disrespect, I think you have a point, but just let us have a few days. I hope you have a good day.

I’m not associating the death Robin Williams to unawareness of worldly issues. I’m just saying it’s ridiculous that media focuses its attention solely on celebrities and dismisses to inform the general public about world affairs, which directly affect all of us. Though keep in mind that Robin Williams was a part of my childhood as much as he was yours, and I loved Genie more than you could ever imagine. Naturally, I am saddened that the world lost such awe-inspiring talent and I’m thankful for all of the smiles he spread, but I’m equally saddened that the world is full of so much incompetency. 

Ok, like, I find it crazy absurd that the entire country is informed about the death of an actor within seconds, but I bet you a million dollars half of them couldn’t tell you there are 3 separate wars taking place around the world, let alone which countries are involved.

…..Aaaaand That pretty much sums up why I can’t stand the human race. 

Sometimes you just gotta eat pizza with extra bacon topping and say fuck it, ya know?


ranger dave hopes you’re ready!!!

Ugh. Why? I’m crying. 


ranger dave hopes you’re ready!!!

Ugh. Why? I’m crying. 

Everyone and their mothers are going to Outsidelands and I’m stuck in the library studying tax law. 

Gawd I hope missing my top 5 favorite artists for corporate america is worth it, because if not, I’m about to flip a bitch. 

Me, myself, and I.

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